The only people up at 3 am are in love, lonely, drunk, or all three.
(via h-albschlaf)

(Source: just-an-autumn)

thors-oh-so-jovial:

thors-oh-so-jovial:

thors-oh-so-jovial:

There is a blind man here tuning my piano and he keeps making blind jokes

quote “you know when people ring me up to ask if I can fix their piano I like to tell them i’m so good I can do it without looking”

Sometimes people ask why i became a piano tuner and i tell them its because they wouldnt let me become a pilot

dioburandou:

daemontool:

remember this show where this one dude had to guess what is he smelling and he put his nose into someones asshole and went “smells like ass” and the commentator went “correct” and this dude did the funniest expression ever. wheres that gif

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merlinwhosuperpotterlock:

"i can’t eat that, i’ll get fat"

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"i can’t sleep in late today i have to do work"

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"no i can’t watch a whole season in one go that’s lazy"

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"i can’t-"

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